I miss hugs

In all honestly, I have been doing social distancing for years.  When people ask, “how are you doing?” in reference to holding up during the COVID-19 quarantine, I honestly don’t feel any different.  If anything, I’ve been more socially connected to my friends and colleagues over the last two weeks.  I’m almost needing a break from all the phone calls and FaceTime sessions.  What I realize though is that after I hung up the phone, it’s the physical touch that I miss the most.

I used to be anti-hugs.  It felt too personal.  Then I did my own therapeutic work and establish healthy attachments and learned to truly be open and vulnerable with others.  What better way to do that than to hug someone?  In this time of social distancing, I miss the hugs the most.

When I go to conferences or travel for work to tour programs, often it’s those fostered relationships that mean the most to me.  The trust, the honesty, the transparency – it can be felt through the hug.

Do I hug everyone I know and see?  Absolutely not.  There are some people who are how I used to be: anti-hugs.  I respect their personal space.  They also know that when/if they ever need a hug, I’m here for them.  This gets me thinking about my clients.  How often we live in a world where human interaction is prioritized through technology use.  Our love tanks are running low if not empty in the physical touch category.  Knowing that makes my heart hurt more.  I need COVID-19 to flattened and fizzle.  I need to be able to hug freely, without fear of infection and contamination.

The times are hard now.  They will be harder the longer we are required to be apart from each other.  Until then, I look forward to when I can hug again.

For questions or comments contact Joanna.

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The Psychological Trauma of Coronavirus